What My Mother Told Me

Copy of First Blog September 19th

Blog I woke up with a couple of weird questions today. Or maybe a couple of realizations that feel weird to me and I'm wondering if anyone else has had this mental experience. The first thing I realized (probably as the result of some long, extensive internal process I was completely unaware of) was that pretty much everything my mother told me growing up was wrong! Little life things and BIG life things that I based minor and major decsions and choices on for the majority of my life. The little stupid things being things like telling me I am long waisted, when actually I'm short waisted. I mean I've been buying the wrong kind of jeans all my life and thought I had no ass, until about 6 months ago. All the sudden I've got this Bangin' Ass that I was completely unaware of in my whole life to date. Who knows what opportunities I've missed as a result of this? :) The Big things being the way I entered into the worst possible relationships, and navigated through them using the completely bass-ackwards rule book she gave me. Not only was it all wrong, most of it was, in reality, catagorically opposite of the actions I should have been taking to get the desired results! Its like when someone gives you a receipe for sugar cookies, only instead of sugar being the main ingredieant they tell you to use salt. And the even more screwed up part is that you really believe you are doing it right, that sugar cookies actually taste that way, because thats the only way you've ever had them! So then, maybe if you are really lucky, really thick skinned and willing to completely humble yourself and throw out everything you've known to be true and right all of your life, completely start over with a new set of parameters and accept that EVERYTHING YOU THINK YOU KNOW MAY BE BULLSHIT, you might wake up one day and say, "Wow, is it possible that most of it was wrong? Is that for real"? Let me tell you, its pretty much a mind blower on many levels. There is a big difference between knowing something intellectually and knowing something because the complete truth of it punched you in the stomach. The kind of knowing in your gut and the fibers of your being, the kind of undeniable, "How can it be but, yeah, it is", knowing. So to my first question, I'm wondering if other people have this kind of parental guidance realization at some point in their lives too? I suppose there are degrees, depending on how messed up your parents were. This next part which is really weird, in that it should have negated all of the former, and goes to the second question for today: Who remembers the first time they realized their parents weren't all knowing and omnipotent? I was 5 or 6 years old and I remember it very clearly. This shocked sensation with this realization that She Was Wrong! And if that was the case, then that meant she didn't know all there is to know about everything in the Universe. Which then of course, led to the second shocker of the day. That there isn't a day or a time or an age when you are just all of a sudden a grown-up and you have all the answeres to everything you've ever wondered about. That was a major bummer. At this point (and I'm quite sure you got to this point WAY before me) you are probably wondering, "Well if you knew at 5 or 6 she wasn't omnipotent, why were you so easily mislead and didn't have a clue it was happening. The only thing I can say in my defense is it must not have occured to me how far from omnipotent we were talking and how wide the gap between her world and reality really was! :) Sooo, did anyone else out there have any of the above dawnings of comprehension at any time? Let me know.